It's been four months and nine days since this site came up. In that time, there has been nothing worthwhile or relevant posted here. That is because writing a theatre blog is a process.
In the future, please refer to http://epicdisappointment3.blogspot.com as the home of Theatre of The Epic disappointment's official blog.
Thank you,
FRANCO
04 August, 2007
11 July, 2007
09 July, 2007
tristis admiratio
This is not an Epic disappointment, and I'll explain why: the Catholics favoring Vatican II were not systematically exterminated, children first. That would have qualified as Epic.
FRANCO
p.s. It also would have been "mass" murder.
FRANCO
p.s. It also would have been "mass" murder.
19 June, 2007
16 June, 2007
All in the Family.
4 disappointing things happened in one day:
--people at work not believing that the Theatre of Epic Disappointment exists/ I'm crazy because I don't stage everything center stage
--watching the tour of "The Color Purple" and realizing that I could do better than the director in his Broadway debut
--seeing people at the theatre simply because the musical was about black people and they still couldn't pay attention
--being dehydrated
Nothing epic. Just a day in the life.
--people at work not believing that the Theatre of Epic Disappointment exists/ I'm crazy because I don't stage everything center stage
--watching the tour of "The Color Purple" and realizing that I could do better than the director in his Broadway debut
--seeing people at the theatre simply because the musical was about black people and they still couldn't pay attention
--being dehydrated
Nothing epic. Just a day in the life.
06 June, 2007
new chart
I spent some time this morning making this. I also have one that shows the trends in homeruns over the last 27 years, and one that compares the winning percentages of the New York Yankees and Cleveland Indians. Email me if you want them.
FRANCO
02 June, 2007
30 May, 2007
Quiznos girl
Have you ever noticed the way the other Quiznos employees treat the young, skinny girl by the cash register (kind of looks like Shelley Long)? They all address her like she's severely dumb. When a customer has an issue (today it was someone with a backdated coupon, which they claimed a worker had previously said was valid), they go "Was it... her?" referring to the young woman in the third person, like she's not just standing there. And it seems like EVERYONE pulls rank on her. As far as I can tell, she's been there since they opened, but all the new guys can dismiss her from the register, leaving her with the only job left: bagging to-go orders, and asking for-here customers if they want a cup of water. They treat her like a child!
Anyway, I'm here to editorialize a little.
My thoughts are this: I genuinely hope she's not disabled or slow or incompetent. I genuinely hope, the other workers have all just made a pact to dominate this really passive person. And it turns out she's actually the rightful heir to something big.
FRANCO
Anyway, I'm here to editorialize a little.
My thoughts are this: I genuinely hope she's not disabled or slow or incompetent. I genuinely hope, the other workers have all just made a pact to dominate this really passive person. And it turns out she's actually the rightful heir to something big.
FRANCO
29 May, 2007
Mailbag!
Dear Tim Israel,
How do they know my name?
New York Theatre Workshop would like to invite you to a performance of
HORIZON, the New York Premiere of a new play created, written and
composed by Rinde Eckert, directed by David Schweizer. We think this
show would be of great interest to you and the readers of your blog.
'readers' - that's you, Mom!
Rinde Eckert, an Obie-winner for AND GOD CREATED GREAT WHALES and 2007
Pulitzer Prize finalist for Drama, is renowned as a writer, composer,
director and performer whose Opera/New Music Theatre productions have
toured extensively. In HORIZON, a work for three actors loosely based on
the teachings of theologian Reinhold Niebuhr, Eckert plays Reinhart
Poole, an unconventional theologian and teacher of ethics at a seminary.
Reinhart, who has been pressured to resign by dogmatic powers within his
church, works all night on his last lecture. He also talks with his
wife, argues with the ghost of his brother, remembers conversations, and
indulges his hobby: writing a comic allegory about two ageless masons
who've been building the same church foundation for 1750 years. In
story, song, movement, and music Reinhart, his family, and his strange
masons inhabit a visually brilliant landscape, a moving and funny
horizon.
This is a lot. I hope you noticed that and stopped reading, too.
Attached is a press release with more information about Rinde, David,
and the production. We would like to invite you to attend one of the
following performances:
Email me if you want the attached press release.
Sunday, June 3rd at 2pm or 7pm
Monday, June 4th at 8pm
Tuesday, June 5th at 7pm
Thursday, June 7th at 8pm
Friday, June 8th at 8pm
Saturday, June 9th at 3pm or 8pm
Sunday, June 10th at 2pm or 7pm
I don't know any of those people!
We'd also like to offer your readers the following discount:
Tickets for all performances June 1 - July 1 are just $35 each (reg.
$50).
Use code HZHVN35 when ordering.
What did I always say? Follow me and you will be taken care of.
To purchase tickets, call TeleCharge at (212) 947-8844 or visit
http://www.broadwayoffers.com/go.aspx?MD=2001&MC=HZHVN35
New York Theatre Workshop also offers both Student Tickets and CheapTix
Sundays.
Stay in school and you will be taken care of.
CheapTix Sundays: All tickets for all Sunday evening performances at 7pm
are just $20 each! Tickets are available in advance but must be
purchased at the NYTW box office on a cash-only basis.
Okay!
Student Tickets: Full-time students with a valid student ID may purchase
$20 tickets for all performances (subject to availability). Limit one
ticket per ID. Tickets must be purchased in person and require an ID at
the box office.
Alright!
If you could post the information on your blog, it would be much
appreciated.
Done!
To book your tickets, please contact Cathy Popowytsch at
CathyP@nytw.org.
Can't believe they'd give out contact information to someone like me.
Thank you,
Matt Joachim
Oh. It's Matt. My housemate.
Marketing Assistant
For a minute I thought it was someone I didn't know, running a google search of theatre blogs.
New York Theatre Workshop
Nope.
79 East 4th Street
Just my buddy who knows about this but doesn't actually read it.
New York, NY 10003
I guess you could call this an Epic disappointment.
phone: (212) 780-9037
Rah Rah.
FRANCO
How do they know my name?
New York Theatre Workshop would like to invite you to a performance of
HORIZON, the New York Premiere of a new play created, written and
composed by Rinde Eckert, directed by David Schweizer. We think this
show would be of great interest to you and the readers of your blog.
'readers' - that's you, Mom!
Rinde Eckert, an Obie-winner for AND GOD CREATED GREAT WHALES and 2007
Pulitzer Prize finalist for Drama, is renowned as a writer, composer,
director and performer whose Opera/New Music Theatre productions have
toured extensively. In HORIZON, a work for three actors loosely based on
the teachings of theologian Reinhold Niebuhr, Eckert plays Reinhart
Poole, an unconventional theologian and teacher of ethics at a seminary.
Reinhart, who has been pressured to resign by dogmatic powers within his
church, works all night on his last lecture. He also talks with his
wife, argues with the ghost of his brother, remembers conversations, and
indulges his hobby: writing a comic allegory about two ageless masons
who've been building the same church foundation for 1750 years. In
story, song, movement, and music Reinhart, his family, and his strange
masons inhabit a visually brilliant landscape, a moving and funny
horizon.
This is a lot. I hope you noticed that and stopped reading, too.
Attached is a press release with more information about Rinde, David,
and the production. We would like to invite you to attend one of the
following performances:
Email me if you want the attached press release.
Sunday, June 3rd at 2pm or 7pm
Monday, June 4th at 8pm
Tuesday, June 5th at 7pm
Thursday, June 7th at 8pm
Friday, June 8th at 8pm
Saturday, June 9th at 3pm or 8pm
Sunday, June 10th at 2pm or 7pm
I don't know any of those people!
We'd also like to offer your readers the following discount:
Tickets for all performances June 1 - July 1 are just $35 each (reg.
$50).
Use code HZHVN35 when ordering.
What did I always say? Follow me and you will be taken care of.
To purchase tickets, call TeleCharge at (212) 947-8844 or visit
http://www.broadwayoffers.com/go.aspx?MD=2001&MC=HZHVN35
New York Theatre Workshop also offers both Student Tickets and CheapTix
Sundays.
Stay in school and you will be taken care of.
CheapTix Sundays: All tickets for all Sunday evening performances at 7pm
are just $20 each! Tickets are available in advance but must be
purchased at the NYTW box office on a cash-only basis.
Okay!
Student Tickets: Full-time students with a valid student ID may purchase
$20 tickets for all performances (subject to availability). Limit one
ticket per ID. Tickets must be purchased in person and require an ID at
the box office.
Alright!
If you could post the information on your blog, it would be much
appreciated.
Done!
To book your tickets, please contact Cathy Popowytsch at
CathyP@nytw.org.
Can't believe they'd give out contact information to someone like me.
Thank you,
Matt Joachim
Oh. It's Matt. My housemate.
Marketing Assistant
For a minute I thought it was someone I didn't know, running a google search of theatre blogs.
New York Theatre Workshop
Nope.
79 East 4th Street
Just my buddy who knows about this but doesn't actually read it.
New York, NY 10003
I guess you could call this an Epic disappointment.
phone: (212) 780-9037
Rah Rah.
FRANCO
28 May, 2007
Sex and Death.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cicada
The infestation has arrived. This magical experience happens once every 17 years in Chicago and various parts of the world, I suppose. They've taken over my house. Soon, their deafening mating calls will keep me from going outside. Then, when they die in two weeks after non-stop sex, they'll come again almost two decades from now and I can say, "Hello, old friend."
Oh, to have crazy sex and die in two weeks. Shakespeare would be proud.
The infestation has arrived. This magical experience happens once every 17 years in Chicago and various parts of the world, I suppose. They've taken over my house. Soon, their deafening mating calls will keep me from going outside. Then, when they die in two weeks after non-stop sex, they'll come again almost two decades from now and I can say, "Hello, old friend."
Oh, to have crazy sex and die in two weeks. Shakespeare would be proud.
23 May, 2007
The One Thing (scene 1)
(At rise: an urban loft. The only piece of furniture is a very large bed in the center of the room. Act One begins in September, and the colors reflect that.)
1. Breakfast at Tiffany's
(ANNE, mid-twenties, single, attractive in a round-face way, sits up in bed.)
ANNE
YOU SAY WE'VE GOT NOTHING IN COMMON
NO COMMON GROUND TO START FROM
AND WE'RE FALLING APART
(RICH, 26, bearded, sits up in bed, next to ANNE.)
RICH
YOU SAY THE WORLD HAS COME BETWEEN US
OUR LIVES HAVE COME BETWEEN US
BUT I KNOW YOU JUST DON'T CARE
(KARL and HELMUT, both mid 40's, sit up in bed on either side of RICH and ANNE.)
ALL
AND I SAID "WHAT ABOUT BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?"
RICH
SHE SAID "I THINK I REMEMBER THE FILM
AND AS I RECALL, I THINK WE BOTH KINDA LIKED IT"
ANNE
AND I SAID "WELL, THAT'S THE ONE THING WE'VE GOT"
KARL
I SEE YOU
ANNE
THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW ME
HELMUT
BUT NOW YOUR EYES SEE THROUGH ME
ANNE
I GUESS I WAS WRONG
RICH
SO WHAT NOW?
ANNE
IT'S PLAIN TO SEE WE'RE OVER
RICH
I HATE WHEN THINGS ARE OVER
ALL
WHEN SO MUCH IS LEFT UNDONE
AND I SAID "WHAT ABOUT BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?"
SHE SAID "I THINK I REMEMBER THE FILM
AND AS I RECALL, I THINK WE BOTH KINDA LIKED IT"
AND I SAID "WELL, THAT'S THE ONE THING WE'VE GOT"
RICH
YOU SAY WE'VE GOT NOTHING IN COMMON
ANNE
AND I SAID "WHAT ABOUT BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?"
RICH
NO COMMON GROUND TO START FROM
AND WE'RE FALLING APART
HELMUT
SHE SAID "I THINK I REMEMBER THE FILM
ANNE
YOU SAY THE WORLD HAS COME BETWEEN US
OUR LIVES HAVE COME BETWEEN US
KARL
AND AS I RECALL, I THINK WE BOTH KINDA LIKED IT"
ANNE
BUT I KNOW YOU JUST DON'T CARE
RICH
AND I SAID "WELL, THAT'S THE ONE THING WE'VE GOT"
----------------------------------------------------------------
FRANCO
1. Breakfast at Tiffany's
(ANNE, mid-twenties, single, attractive in a round-face way, sits up in bed.)
ANNE
YOU SAY WE'VE GOT NOTHING IN COMMON
NO COMMON GROUND TO START FROM
AND WE'RE FALLING APART
(RICH, 26, bearded, sits up in bed, next to ANNE.)
RICH
YOU SAY THE WORLD HAS COME BETWEEN US
OUR LIVES HAVE COME BETWEEN US
BUT I KNOW YOU JUST DON'T CARE
(KARL and HELMUT, both mid 40's, sit up in bed on either side of RICH and ANNE.)
ALL
AND I SAID "WHAT ABOUT BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?"
RICH
SHE SAID "I THINK I REMEMBER THE FILM
AND AS I RECALL, I THINK WE BOTH KINDA LIKED IT"
ANNE
AND I SAID "WELL, THAT'S THE ONE THING WE'VE GOT"
KARL
I SEE YOU
ANNE
THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW ME
HELMUT
BUT NOW YOUR EYES SEE THROUGH ME
ANNE
I GUESS I WAS WRONG
RICH
SO WHAT NOW?
ANNE
IT'S PLAIN TO SEE WE'RE OVER
RICH
I HATE WHEN THINGS ARE OVER
ALL
WHEN SO MUCH IS LEFT UNDONE
AND I SAID "WHAT ABOUT BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?"
SHE SAID "I THINK I REMEMBER THE FILM
AND AS I RECALL, I THINK WE BOTH KINDA LIKED IT"
AND I SAID "WELL, THAT'S THE ONE THING WE'VE GOT"
RICH
YOU SAY WE'VE GOT NOTHING IN COMMON
ANNE
AND I SAID "WHAT ABOUT BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S?"
RICH
NO COMMON GROUND TO START FROM
AND WE'RE FALLING APART
HELMUT
SHE SAID "I THINK I REMEMBER THE FILM
ANNE
YOU SAY THE WORLD HAS COME BETWEEN US
OUR LIVES HAVE COME BETWEEN US
KARL
AND AS I RECALL, I THINK WE BOTH KINDA LIKED IT"
ANNE
BUT I KNOW YOU JUST DON'T CARE
RICH
AND I SAID "WELL, THAT'S THE ONE THING WE'VE GOT"
----------------------------------------------------------------
FRANCO
21 May, 2007
20 May, 2007
more of a disappointment than an Epic disappointment
Billy Dee Williams was also denied the part of Han Solo.
idea
oh oh oh: I got something!
so the seniors, or some group, or someone decided to wrap The Fence entirely in caution tape. whatever. what we do to make it an Epic disappointment is spend playground wrapping The Fence in cloth a la Christo and Jeanne Claude. I'm sure whoever did the caution tape got exactly what they wanted out of it; we, on the other hand, would fall flat on our faces! by supposing any bit of artistic pretension, only to betray it by the sheer lack of magnitude, we'd really have something. i mean, it's perfect. much better than wrapping a picnic table.
FRANCO
so the seniors, or some group, or someone decided to wrap The Fence entirely in caution tape. whatever. what we do to make it an Epic disappointment is spend playground wrapping The Fence in cloth a la Christo and Jeanne Claude. I'm sure whoever did the caution tape got exactly what they wanted out of it; we, on the other hand, would fall flat on our faces! by supposing any bit of artistic pretension, only to betray it by the sheer lack of magnitude, we'd really have something. i mean, it's perfect. much better than wrapping a picnic table.
FRANCO
19 May, 2007
Tastes Like Disappointment.
By allowing my mother to give away two of my dogs, I have created a hole in my heart.
By not pushing Cubs fans out of the train when I had the chance, I have shamed myself.
By attempting to wash away the shame and fill the hole, I have eaten numerous cookies.
Somehow, disappointment doesn't taste so sweet today.
By not pushing Cubs fans out of the train when I had the chance, I have shamed myself.
By attempting to wash away the shame and fill the hole, I have eaten numerous cookies.
Somehow, disappointment doesn't taste so sweet today.
17 May, 2007
btw: DISAPPOINTMENT
In the 1989 - 1997 Batman film franchise, Billy Dee Williams appeared as a pre-disfigurement Dent in Batman (1989). Apparently, Williams signed for this role knowing that D.A. Dent was to become Two-Face in further installments of the franchise. To ensure that he would be given the role, Williams negotiated a "pay or play" contract guaranteeing that Warner Brothers would have to cast him as Two-Face or buy him out. However, when Two-Face was to become the main villain in the third movie, director Tim Burton had abdicated to Joel Schumacher, who decided to hire Tommy Lee Jones, and agreed to pay Williams for his cooperation allowing them to use the character.
new piece
Note: this text is for an outdoor, public performance. It is written in the style of environmental theatre, and assumes that it is playing to a foot-traffic audience.
At rise: Light rain. COMMODORE KEEN stands on a raised ledge, approximately three feet off the ground from a main throughway (perhaps a sidewalk). Several paces behind him, and raised about two additional feet off the ground is a BOY, standing at attention.
BOY
Fine day, I say!
COMMODORE KEEN
(After reflective pause.)
Fine day.
(Surveying pause. This lasts until a pedestrian or car passes by.)
BOY
Fine day, I say!
COMMODORE KEEN
Fine day.
(Pause.)
COMMODORE KEEN
It is finished.
(With a sense of dignified completeness, he steps down from his ledge, turns, and exits. Beat. The BOY follows.)
At rise: Light rain. COMMODORE KEEN stands on a raised ledge, approximately three feet off the ground from a main throughway (perhaps a sidewalk). Several paces behind him, and raised about two additional feet off the ground is a BOY, standing at attention.
BOY
Fine day, I say!
COMMODORE KEEN
(After reflective pause.)
Fine day.
(Surveying pause. This lasts until a pedestrian or car passes by.)
BOY
Fine day, I say!
COMMODORE KEEN
Fine day.
(Pause.)
COMMODORE KEEN
It is finished.
(With a sense of dignified completeness, he steps down from his ledge, turns, and exits. Beat. The BOY follows.)
16 May, 2007
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